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    The Jokes Database

    They say laughter is the best medicine...even when you aren't sick.

    All Time Favorite Jokes

    Post your most favorite joke EVER! (Please, only 1 favorite joke per member).
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    Posts1

    Animal Jokes

    What did the duck say when he bought lipstick? "Put it on my bill."
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    Posts39

    Bar Jokes

    So this dyslexic guy walks into a bra.
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    Posts26

    Blonde Jokes

    What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells? Pregnant.
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    Posts7

    Celebrity Jokes

    The government shutdown has officially lasted longer than any of Taylor Swift's relationships.
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    Posts7

    Chuck Norris

    Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
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    Posts25

    Dad Jokes

    Want to hear a joke about construction? -- I'm still working on it.
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    Posts97

    Doctor Jokes

    The doctor told the woman she can no longer touch anything alcoholic. So she got a divorce.
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    Posts6

    Dirty jokes

    What did the one butt cheek say to the other butt cheek? "Together, we can stop this shit."
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    Posts38

    Engineer Jokes

    There are 10 types of people: Those who understand binary, and those who don't.
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    Posts12

    Ethnic Jokes

    Mario is an Italian plumber, speaks English, looks like a Mexican, jumps like a black man, and grabs coins like a Jew.
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    Posts59

    Foreign Language

    Jokes in original languages.
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    Posts25

    Barzellette italiane

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    Posts18

    Chistes españoles

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    Posts0

    Svenska skämt

    En bra historia är en rolig historia.
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    Posts7

    Gay Jokes

    I was going to make a gay joke, butt fuck it.
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    Posts12

    Insults

    You are depriving some poor village of its idiot.
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    Posts9

    Irish Jokes

    So this Irishman walks out of a bar.....Nah, that would never happen.
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    Posts17

    Jokes for Blokes

    I changed my password to "penis". But it was too short.
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    Posts37

    Jokes for Gals

    What did one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob? "We better get some support before someone thinks we're nuts!"
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    Posts13

    Knock Knock Jokes

    Knock knock. Who's there? Cow says. Cow says who? No, cow says moooo!
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    Posts4

    Little Johnny Jokes

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    Posts5

    Marriage Jokes

    I've been married so long, that fucking is now just an adjective.
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    Posts16

    Midget Jokes

    What do you call a chubby midget? Low fat.
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    Posts9

    Miscellaneous Jokes

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    Posts34

    Nerd Jokes

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    Posts15

    Original Jokes

    Did you make your own joke? Add it here!
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    Posts4

    Pickup Lines

    You look like a parking ticket...You got fine written all over you!
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    Posts8

    Pirate Jokes

    What do you call a pirate with two eyes and two legs? A rookie
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    Posts2

    Political Jokes

    Politicians and diapers have one thing in common: they should both be changed regularly… and for the same reason.
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    Posts5

    Q & A Jokes

    Why did God create alcohol? So fat women can get laid too.
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    Posts27

    Religious Jokes

    If Mary had Jesus, and Jesus is the lamb of God, does that mean Mary had a little lamb?
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    Posts16

    Sven & Olle Jokes

    Sven and Olle are two Scandinavians who immigrated to the US and are so dumb, that blondes tell jokes about them.
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    Posts8
    New Posts
    • The Joker
      Jul 31
      Monks getting ordained
      Dirty jokes
      Twelve monks were about to be ordained. The final test was for them to line up nude while a nude nun danced before them. Each monk had a small bell attached to his penis, and they were told that anyone whose bell rang would not be ordained because he had not reached a state of purity. The nude nun danced before the first monk candidate, with no reaction. She danced in front of the second monk and also didn't get a reaction. She proceeded down the line with the same response from all the monks, until she got to the last monk. As she danced in front of him, his bell rang so loudly it fell off and clattered to the ground. Embarrassed, he bent down to pick up the bell, and all the other bells started ringing.
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    • The Joker
      Jul 26
      What do you get when you mix poop, a parrot, and a puppy?
      Dad Jokes
      A shit-talking son of a bitch.
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    • The Joker
      Jul 26
      Swedish word
      Ethnic Jokes
      In Sweden they have a word for crying when masterbating. It's called "gråtrunka". The fact that they actually have a word for that is a real tear jerker.
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